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Speed Dating

by May-Lan Tan

I cut my own hair.
I can see in the dark.

I look better naked.
Money doesn’t excite me.

I need more sleep than most other people.
I only take care of the parts of my body that others can see.

I can never tell when someone is joking.
I prefer to eat really delicious food in private.

I’m not scared of death.
I’m scared of being deep in the ground by myself.

If nothing else, I am hygienic.
I always leave without saying goodbye.

If I lived alone I would be like a wild animal.
I’ve never planted something and watched it grow.

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