Upon Waking

by Jennifer E. Hudgens

I listen to Jack Kerouac, I 

masturbate to the sound of

his voice, to lovers who

don’t know I love them. 
My
 two tom cats asleep on my

feet, god stopped watching

out for my family months ago.

He told me yesterday that I

needed a distraction, he meant
 I 
needed his body on mine-
marijuana 
latent and pierced 
cock, it might feel 
good enough
 to make me forget life 
for a 
moment. Forget that my father

can barely breathe-barely speak-

cannot swallow-cannot chew-

My father listens to Cat Stevens and

pretends that this is all a strange

dream. We all want to wake up.
 
Jack keeps me busy, life keeps

the pain slow, the pleasure fleeting.

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